The Monster's Footprint
by FairyKei
Summary: Johan has vanished from the hospital, after being handed to death for a second time. No trace has been left of his whereabouts, but Nina and Tenma discover something hidden in the town of Ruhenheim. It is a small envelope, and it contains letters… letters from Johan to those who knew him.
1. Chapter 1- Discovery

**Hello there. I hope you enjoy this story. It's going to be about five chapters long- Chapter one being an introductory chapter, and the rest being the letters which Johan had written. Johan is one of the most amazing villains out there. I hope I can do some justice! Also, I apologise for any typos. Enjoy, and review please! **

Chapter 1- Discovery

It was over. It was finally over.

So, why on Earth were they returning to this awful place?  
>The question drummed through Doctor Tenma's head repeatedly, becoming louder and louder with each step he took towards his destination. Walking beside him was Nina- still blonde, still beautiful, still the spitting image of her twin brother. However breath-taking Nina looked, behind her eyes slept a trauma powerful enough to drive her insane. Behind Tenma's eyes, there was only regret. Instead of looking like the image on the postcards, the town was desolate and drained of all life; even the sky had relinquished its light, and the whole place swum in a hue of darkness.<p>

This was the first time that either of them had returned to Ruhenheim after the near massacre six months ago. Despite the town being prevented from complete disaster, everybody had abandoned the place after the incident. As they walked through the central street, Tenma shuddered. The feeling of tension overhanging them was palpable. It was as if Johan's presence was still here, overshadowing it. Now that Johan had disappeared, he seemed more like a presence than a human being. He was the manifestation of something terrible.

"Do you remember the exact place?" Tenma asked Nina.

Nina nodded, and, wide-eyed, pointed to a hill in the distance. "It's over there…" she whispered. "Amongst the trees, behind that hill, it's there. The 'vampire's' house."

Seeing that Nina already felt the pressure of having returned, Tenma placed a hand on her shoulder. Encouragingly, he sent a smile in her direction, and she responded with a weak twitch of her mouth.

"Thank you for coming here with me, Doctor Tenma. I couldn't have come back to this place alone, not after what happened here…"

"…and you're sure you're okay to do this? If you start to feel ill, we are heading back."

She shook her head resolutely. "I'm here for Johan."

Tenma sniffed. Yes, Johan. Johan had been comatose ever since he had been shot in the head for the second time. Nevertheless, on the day Tenma chose to visit Johan in the police hospital, Johan vanished. He only turned away for a moment, but when he turned back, the bed was empty, the window was open and Johan was nowhere to be seen.  
>He had looked so innocent when asleep, the monster had. Johan's face was calm, serene, spread out into a relaxed expression. Tenma wondered if Johan had heard him, when he told him that Johan was indeed given a name by his mother. When Tenma spoke Johan's real name to him, he could have sworn that the young man's face appeared more content. If anyone met Johan while he was asleep, the possibility that there was a monster lurking in his head would seem absurd.<p>

"We're almost here," Nina observed.

While Tenma had been lost in his thoughts of Johan, they had left the main hub of the town, and where now well into the outskirts. The 'vampire's' house was not far from this path, leading through the trees. The forest thickened, the air became even darker and more laced with tension, until the pressure was so much that Nina's steps began to falter. She paused for a moment, and stumbled, clutching her mouth.

Tenma caught hold of her in time. "Nina, are you okay? We can stop for a second, if it's getting too much."

"No, no. Don't worry about me. This happens to me a lot. Knowing that this place is associated with Franz Bonaparta, somehow awakens thoughts in me that are frightening."

Eventually, they reached the abandoned house. Tenma eased open the front door, which creaked loudly, as if it were alerting the world to their trespass of its vicinity. No light reached the innards of the building, and so Tenma reached into his pocket, pulled out a small torch, and switched it on. The downstairs floor was of little interest to them. What they were looking for, was the items situated _upstairs. _Namely, some drawings, some books, or maybe even a clue to Johan's whereabouts.

"This is the room, isn't it?" Tenma guessed, pointing towards a door just at the top of the stairs. Nina nodded, and he opened it. They entered the room.

Tenma half-expected the grisly form of Johan to leap out at them from the shadows, but the musty room was only filled with silence. To him, the room was exactly as it had been left by them, with everything in the same position. To Nina, however, something was amiss.  
>She stood, staring into space, with a terrified expression.<p>

"Oh my God…" she whispered, her voice trembling. "Something's different." She gathered strength. "Tenma, something's different. I think… I think Johan came back here!"

"Why?" he asked hurriedly. "What has changed?"

"The drawings of us on the floor are arranged differently. They're in chronological order. Johan was here, and he put them into a timeline of our childhood!"

Nina rummaged through the pictures, but seemed to pause above the last drawing. It was of their faces- only their faces- with no hair or other features to distinguish them. It was a true demonstration of just how identical they were. She picked the picture off the floor, and suddenly gasped.

"What is it, Nina?!"

Tenma hurried down to Nina's side, staring at the same thing she was. Upon seeing it, he was paralysed with shock.

It was an envelope. A new envelope, with letters inside. On it was written:

_To my dear Doctor Tenma, and to my precious other self._

- - _Johan_


	2. Chapter 2- What have you done to me?

**Hello. Here's chapter 2 for you. I hope you enjoy, and review! **

**Chapter 2- What have you done to me, Anna?**

Nina began to tremble. She shrunk into a crouch, clutching the envelope in her hands. Tenma stooped down beside her, watching as her delicate fingers ran over the rough brown paper, while her eyes stared unblinking at the writing scrawled on its surface. That was Johan's handwriting, for sure. Tenma remembered the two times Johan had left notes for him in the past:

- _My dear Doctor Tenma… Look at me. Look at me. The monster inside me is getting bigger._

- _Help! The monster inside me is about to explode!_

His writing was untidy, shaky, as if he were fighting a war within himself. Tenma's memories of finding the notes from Johan were filled with fear- Lord only knew what Nina felt.

"You want to open it and see what's inside?" he asked quietly. When Nina did not answer, he added, "You can put it down if you want."

"No," she said at last. "We came here to search for clues of Johan's whereabouts, or even to understand him better. If I keep on running away and giving in, I'll never defeat the monster inside _me, _either."

"Very well then."

Nina opened the sealed envelope. It contained several letters written on thick, quality paper. All of the writing was in sharp, black ink, and this time, Johan's handwriting was perfect. Some of the paper bore signs of considerable age compared to the others, slightly yellowed in its appearance. The letters were tied to together with a piece of string. It looked as if Johan had taken great care in preserving the quality of these pages.

"I'll read the first letter, since… since it's addressing me," said Nina. "It was written quite some time ago. Wait a minute… This wasn't long before the Fortner couple was murdered."

Tenma looked over Nina's shoulder as she read, and as he read, he felt a rising sense of… was it guilt? No, it was not. It was an indescribable feeling. What sort of feeling should he have called it? This feeling of invading the private thoughts of someone like him, even though he had willingly given them up. Tenma swallowed, and carried on reading.

_To my other self __To Anna,_

_I suppose you are uninformed with regards to my whereabouts… Many things have happened since we parted. I have stayed with different people, acquired new skills, but to what end? What aim have I been traveling towards? I have plans to infiltrate the German economy. You might hear about it soon._

_Johan and Anna. Those were the names bestowed upon us, once upon a time. Do you remember? I don't suppose you do. Anna, Anna, Anna, how could you have forgotten __**that**__? Your name is 'Anna'; it is not 'Nina'. 'Nina Fortner'. That is a false identity, do you know? I am sure that, deep within your mind, all of your memories are buried. The truth is, there are some things I do not remember. I do, however, recall enough. _

_You, who have blissfully forgotten everything about your former life, about me, your twin, you seem so content. But it is not true happiness. I will soon free you from this life, my dear Anna. I will come to collect you on our twentieth birthday, and all will be right again. I will have somebody to call me by- at least- one name. _

_I will not be sending this letter. Instead, I have obtained your contact information and will be sending you an email. Perhaps your memory is not so blurred that you won't realise who is contacting you. Soon, the world shall be ours alone, and we will be together to witness the scenery for a doomsday._

- _Johan_

_P.S- The gunshot scar on my head was throbbing today; I thought of you._

There was something chilling about catching a glimpse into the mind of a person such as Johan. Tenma's breathing had hitched; Nina merely held the paper in her hands, frowning. Still knelt on the grimy floor, Tenma took the letter from Nina, his hand briefly brushing hers as he lifted it from her palms.  
>The personality depicted on the paper here appeared to be real- much more real than the terrifying array of 'notes' Johan had left behind at several crime scenes. It seemed to Tenma that Johan was not purely a monster, nor did he possess a split personality, as Nina had once suggested. Something more unfathomable surrounded the origins of Johan's identity.<p>

"At this point, my brother still believed that the Red Rose Mansion incident happened to him," Nina said, breaking the tense silence. "But, in this letter, he seems to pity me more than himself. If anything, he presents himself as some kind of revolutionary. I… I don't understand."

Tenma shook his head, deep in thought. "Some of it appears to try to make you feel guilty for forgetting your childhood, but I don't think that was Johan's intention. He probably meant to build up his image in this letter, rather than put you down."

"But why would he need to do that?"

"I don't know. He seems to be split between indecision, pity, and determination." Tenma's mouth curved into a slight smile. "It feels like we are learning more, doesn't it?"

Nina nodded. "Yes. Shall we read the next letter?"


	3. Chapter 3- Time to end it all, I think

Greetings! I started university on the 21st, and things have been very stressful and CRAZILY busy ever since. So, this is the first chance I've had to sit down and upload anything. Please enjoy, and review! Thanks for the support.

**Chapter 3- Time to end it all, I think**

Nina put the first letter down on the floor. By now, both she and Tenma were sat with their legs crossed on the floor, engrossed in this glimpse of Johan's world. She revised her decision, and decided to place the letters in the satchel bag she had brought with her, to keep them safe. If anything, they would make a fascinating memento.  
>Tenma wondered: was this Johan's way of toying with them? Johan had pretended to harbour a split personality before, simply to throw him off guard. <em>'Help! The monster inside me is about to explode!' <em>The words rang in his head. He had gone over them a thousand times, even reading the picture book from which they came. Even if he convinced himself that Johan was toying with him back then, part of him still wondered if Johan really had a split personality. The theories surrounding the young man were countless.

The letters they read now seemed so different from the 'Johan' who had scrawled the disturbing messages at the murder scenes.

"This next one is dated not long before Ruhenheim," Nina muttered, unfolding the paper. "In fact, this was written only a few days before the incident."

Tenma nodded. "It's addressed to you again."

After reading it for a moment in silence, Nina bit her lip. "He's unstable again in this letter. It was after I told him that he was mistaken; after he discovered that he had mixed up his childhood with mine. Oh my goodness... Tenma, you have to read this."

_WHO AM I?_

_Oh Anna, Anna. I felt good about the 511 Kinderheim uprising once again, today. I remembered watching all of those ants, jumping up and down and slashing each other with knives, and strangling and scratching and screaming. That fire blazing next to me as I sat in the chair, the smell of burning dead flesh… I wanted to get rid of them, and to punish them. They had tried to interfere with my memories. _

_Do you know what horrors were abundant at 511 Kinderheim? A common experiment was to expose the child to intermittent television showings, whilst putting them under a great deal of stress. The many outcomes included sociopathic tendencies, and split personalities. They would place some children in total isolation for weeks on end, in order to observe the psychological effects. What they were most interested in was to create 'perfect citizens of the future.' We were regularly drugged, and given many tests. They said I was a perfect pupil before I even arrived at the orphanage. The experiment I shall not forgive them for was the one in which they tried to take away my memories of you. I begged them not to. I swore I would not lose my memories, but it did not work._

_When I was exposed to 'The Nameless Monster' at the university, my childhood memories returned. Perhaps due to the drug experiments at 511 Kinderheim, my memories had become blurred and distorted. The Red Rose Mansion seemed to be a part of my memory. I have come to hate that orphanage all the more because of that mistake. _

_What have I been doing up until now? I think, my dear, precious Anna, it is time to end everything. Maybe it is time for me to die and leave no trace of my existence. By now, you have probably deduced that that is my intention. You always were quite clever. But, not clever enough to aim properly the first time!_

_I will see you in Ruhenheim, the scenery for a doomsday. Time and time and time and time again, I've experienced the darkest of the dark. I wonder if perhaps I am impervious to fear. Why do we not find out? Tell Herr Doctor Tenma to bring his best gun. _

_And once again, I say,_

_HELP! THE MONSTER INSIDE ME IS GETTING BIGGER!_

_MUNCH MUNCH, GOBBLE GOBBLE, GULP. _

"This is awful…" Tenma said in a low voice. "Look at how agitated he appears to be. Who would have ever thought that his mind is in such chaos?"

Nina left a long pause, before folding the letter back up and placing it with the others. She sighed and said, "I know. When I told him that he was mistaken, he laughed, but he also looked like he was crying. I've only seen him cry one other time, the time back at the Three Frogs."

"The life he has led has just been a series of traumatic events, one after the other. You experienced amnesia, but Johan's instability must have made him more impressionable. To an already unstable child, they conducted sickening experiments, which must have made matters worse."

"It's like he has a storm raging behind his blank eyes. I think I always knew that, even when we were children."

Again, this time, the handwriting was scrawled and jagged. Parts rippled across the paper while others were densely packed together, all in thick, black ink. With Johan, it seemed that there was no build up to any of his thoughts or actions. To him, it was peak or trough, black or white, saint or scum. Anna was placed in an almost angelic regard, and Johan was yet to kill Tenma. Yet, every other life was meaningless to him.

Tenma thought of showing some of this to Doctor Gillen. After all, he was a criminologist who was very accomplished. And with examples of Johan's handwriting, Gillen might have uncovered droves of information. He frowned; when did understanding Johan become more of an obsession than killing him? Perhaps when he was with him in the hospital. Seeing Johan asleep reminded him of that same boy he once saved, all those years ago.

"Hm," Tenma mused. "I must be going soft on him again."

"It's because you're a doctor. It's in your nature." Nina smiled at him and he returned the gesture. "There's not many to read now. We're getting closer to understand him."

The mood was beginning to lift. From a low, almost despairing atmosphere, the stimulation of the letters had made them both forget. The name 'Ruhenheim' seemed meaningless, and so did the 'vampire's house'. Right now, it was only them, and the lingering presence of Johan.

_Tell Herr Doctor Tenma to bring his best gun._

The words came from his memory like a barrage, and Tenma was brought to silence once again as he lifted the next piece of paper.


End file.
